Why she's not married

Tracy McMillan explains to single women why they aren't married:

1. You're a Bitch

Here's what I mean by bitch. I mean you're angry. You probably don't think you're angry. You think you're super smart, or if you've been to a lot of therapy, that you're setting boundaries. But the truth is you're pissed. At your mom. At the military-industrial complex. At Sarah Palin. And it's scaring men off. The deal is: most men just want to marry someone who is nice to them.

This is true. Many women, far more women than most women honestly want to admit, are just bitches. They're mad at the world and they're going to take it out on anyone who gives them the opportunity. Most men who are even remotely attractive to women know this on some level and avoid such women like the plague.

2. You're Shallow

When it comes to choosing a husband, only one thing really, truly matters: character. So it stands to reason that a man's character should be at the top of the list of things you are looking for, right? But if you're not married, I already know it isn't. Because if you were looking for a man of character, you would have found one by now. Men of character are, by definition, willing to commit.

This isn't true. It is downright false to claim that character is defined by one's willingness to commit to a relationship. In fact, it takes character to be willing to honestly and openly announce one's unwillingness to commit. Also, McMillan seems to not notice that by taking this position, she has damned nearly all women under the age of thirty as being of low character. Is a woman who is focused on her education or career of intrinsically low character? Should men not therefore behave accordingly?

That being said, Laundry List women are shallow and their shallowness does cause them to reject many men who might well make excellent husbands.

3. You're a Slut

Hooking up with some guy in a hot tub on a rooftop is fine for the ladies of Jersey Shore -- but they're not trying to get married. You are. Which means, unfortunately, that if you're having sex outside committed relationships, you will have to stop. Why? Because past a certain age, casual sex is like recreational heroin -- it doesn't stay recreational for long.

This is true, but it misses the point. Men love sluts... but they don't want to marry women who have had sex with too many other men, with "too many" being a variable that primarily depends upon the man's own sexual history and sexual rank. A few men are fine with 20 or so, most find 10 to be the outside limit, and more than you might think consider 3 to be unacceptable. While it's true that emotionally bonding to unsuitable men doesn't help a woman get married, the bigger problem with sluttiness is that it renders a woman significantly less marriageable in male eyes. This doesn't mean that a known or perceived slut won't eventually get married, but she'll usually marry a lower quality, lower rank man than she could otherwise have obtained. That, or she'll misrepresent herself and build her marriage on a foundation of deceit.